To quote the band “Tears for Fears”…”Shout, Shout let it all out…” Sometimes you just have to shout. I have found in the 12 step Celebrate Recovery program that I am involved, actually the better word here would be engrossed in…I used to blame everyone and everything for my issues. Come to find out, it has always been me. I used to think recovery programs were for “those people” when all along I had hurts, habits, and hang-ups. What does this have to do with shouting? In recovery I introduce myself as: James, a child of God who struggles with co-dependency, anger, sexual integrity, depression, religious spirit, food addiction. You see I struggle…and I try not to live in my struggles. I have always stuffed my issues and I have found out that stuffing only lasts for so long. I finally came to a point in my life were I was going to BLOW…God finally got my attention. I was sick of being sick and sick of wrestling God, a match that I can’t win. Having said all of this and probably wasting a minute of your time, here’s what I really wanted to say…I am shouting to God that I am sick of being a 90 lb wuss, and I want to trust God with everything that I am, not 68%...everything…100%.
Step 3 in Celebrate recovery stats, “3. Made a decision to turn our life and our will over to the care of God. “Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God –this is your spiritual act of worship.” Romans 12:1 NIV. This is really hard because its COMPLETE surrend…I have to give up and turn to God. Here is STEP 3’s prayer:
Dear God, I have tried to do it all by myself, on my own power, and I have failed. TODAY, I want to turn my life over to You. I ask you to be my Lord and Savior. You are the One and ONLY Higher Power! I ask You to help me think less about me and my will. I want to daily turn my will over to You, to daily seek Your direction and wisdom for my life. Please continue to help me overcome my hurts, habits, and hang-ups and may that victory over them help others as they see Your power at work in changing my life. Help me to do Your will always. In Jesus’ name I pray, AMEN.
I can be such a wuss but I am thankful that God loves and gives me the strength and peace to do what I have to do. Basically, I am nothing without God. So for me, I know what the scriptures say in my head…its time for to live them from my heart. God is and always will be bigger than me and there is nothing impossible for Him to do. WORDS ARE JUNK…Its time for me to just do it, just trust Him. So if you read this, and you have struggles…there is nothing too difficult for God to fix, you just have to let Him do it. Remember if God’s not in control of your life, your life is out of control. I might be a wuss and have 83 things that I struggle with…I am forgiven and God has grace for me through Jesus and God can remove from me what doesn’t belong…I just have to move myself aside and let Him use His Holy Spirit to guide me and He will do the same for you.
Sincerely a wuss in recovery;
-Gravy JMM
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5 comments:
Yes Jim,
You are a wuss...
But so am I. Isn't it amazing how much truer the words we say become as we get older?
Wisdom comes slow.
And to quote the biggest wuss of all, aka Jeff Suffering;
"Pain will allow cleansing..."
I thought Sally was the biggest wuss of them all...
I'm not 90 lb's to start with. but you don't have to be to lose the fight. After traeling 3/4 of the world and seeing a lot of places, the conclusion remains the same. God is everywhere and so are His people. I have yet to meet a perfect Christian. But I have met some who were trying to do better each day. Better at talking to God, better at treating each other right. The only line from Bill & Ted that sticks with me is "Be excellent to each other." and it is the only part of the movie that makes sense.
Every Christian is in recovery if they are a true believer. We all need to recover from sin.
Pop,
You need to blog about the believers you've met worldwide... I'd like to read that.
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